Her moral compass

While we were driving in the car this past weekend, Anna had a small package of M&M's that she was dutifully sharing with Luke. After a few minutes of this, she said to Ben and me, "These M&M's are SO good that I really wish I didn't have to share them with Luke. If there wasn't a Jesus, I'd eat the whole package and not share ONE of them with him."

I took Luke to our local library storytime the other day. The theme was "pets" which most of the stories revolved around. The storyteller asked the children if they had pets at their house. While all of the other kids were telling about pet dogs, cats, and birds, Luke piped up quite loudly over the other kids with pure excitement and joy in his eyes that he "had a BIG nice cat at his house that he sleeps with at night." The cat in question? His beloved stuffed animal cat. How sad...perhaps it's time for us to get a pet that moves and breathes so that our kids know the joy of a live animal?

After storytime ended, I ran into a neighbor and was talking to her, not really paying a whole lot of attention to Luke as he gathered books from the shelves. I heard him talking loudly, but wasn't really listening as I was involved in a conversation. Finally, VERY loudly, he yelled with great impatience, "Mom! I stopped peeing in my underwear and now I REALLY have to go to the bathroom!" As storytime had just ended, many parents were meandering and couldn't help but hear his declaration. Amongst their snickers, one of them told me he'd been announcing his toilet needs progressively louder until finally I listened up. Such a character...

Our new neighbors

Believe it or not, we have new neighbors...not the kind of neighbors I prefer, but new neighbors nonetheless. Ben called me the other day to break the news that an entire family of RACCOONS had taken up residence in our chimney!!! Yes, raccoons, and yes, our chimney. We'd been hearing some rustling in our basement which I attributed to mice (thankfully I was wrong), but Ben got up on the roof with his flashlight to see eight innocent yellow eyes staring up at him from the depths below. This perhaps wouldn't have been so terrifying had we not just listened to a story on our favorite radio program EVER, This American Life on NPR, about a rabid raccoon's encounter with a woman who had to hit it over the head for 15 minutes with a tire iron to abate a pretty serious attack. I should probably take this opportunity to encourage all readers who have never listened to this delightful program to download the free weekly podcast for pure unadulterated entertainment. On second thought, perhaps that rabid raccoon story isn't the best recruitment tool, but trust me, you will NOT be disappointed.

Back to the issue at hand...Ben, thinking the problem would have the simplest of solutions, called Animal Control to come and get the varmints out of our chimney. But no, they do not retrieve them unless the animals have already been caught. They rented us a trap and gave us some catfood, telling us we would have trapped raccoons by morning and then they'd pick them up for us. Well, the trap definitely worked, just not the way we expected.

The next morning, I received a disturbing phone call from my non-animal neighbor who happens to be a good friend. Nervously, she told me that her kids heard loud animal noises coming from our yard on the way to school. They came to our yard, saw the trap, the open can of cat food, and their trapped pet cat mewing, or shall I say lamenting loudly. Based on the evidence at hand, their family made the natural assumption that we, the Belnaps, were trying to catch their cats to get rid of our feline friends. My poor neighbor had been crying all morning and against the advice of her husband, called us about the situation. After much emphatic explanation about our varmint problems on my part, the issue was resolved. She ended the phone call in a much more lighthearted tone...I'm just so glad she called me about it.

Two days later, that cat was still the only victim of our trap, which by the way, doesn't hurt animals, just traps them. Every night, the scratching and rustling of the raccoons in the chimney grew louder, we could see dirt and junk falling amongst the cracks in the flue into our fireplace, and I was beginning to feel infested and diseased, not to mention extremely anxious that they would find a way to get under the flue, hide under a bed, attack our children, and leave me with the only logical option of beating it with a tire iron for 15 minutes.

And then, a light...a grand discovery. Ben got on the roof this morning, looked down the chimney, and found that the animals were gone. As they are nocturnal and leave the chimney only at night, we weren't sure as to whether they were sleeping down there, or just hadn't returned from their raucous night of dumpster diving. He threw stuff down there, banged on the flue from underneath, and finally just to be sure, threw a burning stick down the chimney to smoke any lollygaggers out. Nothing...they are GONE! We quickly bought a cover/grate designed to prevent such problems, installed it, and are now in the clear, all without ever trapping a raccoon.

And tonight, yet another call from another cat-owning anxious neighbor who had "heard" we were in the business of purposely trapping cats in our yard. She laughed after another lengthy explanation on my part...that relieved embarrassed kind of laugh. I thought we had a better reputation than the neighborhood quacks who kill family pets, but whatever...

Moral of the story: Install chimney covers if you haven't already, and definitely download "This American Life"...you'll thank us someday.

Mutiny

Two and a half year old Luke has a really interesting way of making his gratitude for all of my hard work on his behalf known. He made me feel like a million bucks the other day. Our conversation went as follows.

Luke (in the most casual, nonchalant voice possible): Mama, you know what?
Me: What?
Luke: I don't think I like you anymore. I just like Grandma Tammie.

Huh? How am I supposed to reply to that? There was no malice in his tone, no defiance, just the statement of a fact, pure and simple. Bless his little heart...or should I bless mine?

Five years!

Our little gal turned five years old last week. Five years seems so short, but when you look at in the life of a kid, it's not short at all. I guess time really is relative, huh? Five years ago, she depended on us for every need, and now, she heads out the door to the carpool with her backpack, bouncy curls, and little more than a hug, grin, and a wave. Time goes so fast.

My pregnancy with Anna was a HUGE surprise. Huge, huge, huge. We'd been married three months...I'd just started my graduate degree and Ben was finishing up at the Community College. We were living in a one bedroom apartment and really (especially Ben) not planning to become parents so soon. Needless to say, we were overwhelmed...nervously excited yet overwhelmed. As time went on, we came up with the name "Anna" as one of our options. And then one night, Ben had a dream with a soundtrack. Yes, you read that right, a soundtrack. Only Ben would have a dream with a soundtrack. In his dream, he was rocking a baby to sleep and the song "Anna Begins" by Counting Crows was echoing through the dream. It's a love song, some of which is very apt. We knew that was to be her name and we knew all was going to be well. And so it has. Anna is a kid you just don't forget. She's unique, generous, a thinker, intelligent, very very funny, and to us, totally adorable. She's extremely cautious about some things and an absolute wild child about others. You never know what's going to come out of her mouth, and hence she ALWAYS keeps us on our toes. She has changed our lives in so many ways, ways we didn't even know needed changing. We completely adore her.

Her birthday has been the subject of much discussion for months. She made a birthday chain three weeks before and even asked the preschool carpool to turn around one morning because she "forgot to do something REALLY important." She dashed in the door and breathlessly announced that she forgot to take a link off her paper chain. I was dumbfounded and apologized profusely to the carpool driver for the "emergency." Who has that kind of guts? Here are a couple of pictures from the exciting day.

Her favorite part of the day, Build a Bear, and she luckily chose the cheapest bear they had. She LOVED this and was so proud of her "teddy dog, Anna Rose." (Thanks, Lyndsey, for the idea I got from your blog) She got to put the heart in the the bear, stuff him, wash him, and bring him home in a case.


The Bounce House...Ben doing a train with Anna, Elize (niece), and Luke, or the top of his hair.


Cake and presents...birthday party with Grandparents...the perfect day.






Happy Birthday, Anna Rose! We love you, sis.

Ben's Special Little Week

So we've had a good week, or I guess the kids and I have had a good week; for Ben, it's been a bit stressful and a relief to have overwith.

First, the marathon. Ben just ran the St. George marathon. In my last post, I stated that we were off to sunny St. George last weekend. Well, sunny it was not. In fact, it was anything but sunny. It was POURING RAIN all day Saturday and you guessed it, all Saturday morning throughout the race. This is the first race they've had in 25 years in which it rained. He finished in 3:47...that's three hours and 47 minutes of running through the cold drizzle. He said the rain was motivation to just get off the course. Just to watch him cross the finish line, I had to buy the kids umbrellas and hoodies. His hands were so frozen that he finally gave up on a protein bar the last few miles as he couldn't unwrap it.

Rain included, it was really a great morning. We were so proud of him and the kids definitely enjoyed screaming for him when he finished. Anna wanted him to win so badly that we finally just told her he did. (Bad parents?) That was fabulous for her. Later, after pondering the achievments of her race-winning father, she said to us, "You know what is so amazing? A lot of people crossed the finish line before Dad, and he STILL won." Amazing. Luke was just satisfied to push his stroller around in the rain. Here are a couple of pix from the day.

Trying to fake a smile...he wore old shoes and he limped for days afterward



Luke with Grandpa Chris


About to cross the finish line. He laughed at this picture because he didn't know he was being photographed and his pain is just so visible. It's hard to fake when you don't know someone's taking a picture. He wore his Obama shirt to "make his contribution" to the campaign. Funny. And even more funny, notice the blood marks about nipple-height on the shirt. For all you Office fans out there, he became my own little Andy Bernard with his chaffed nipples...but his bled through.

Some pictures of the kids at a great park in Beaver. We stopped on the way down for a seriously needed break from the driving.


And finally, Ben defended his thesis this week. He has been so stressed getting to this point. The beauty of it is that his huge prelim exams in November and his dissertation are all he has left. His dissertation is pretty much going to be an expansion of his thesis, so hopefully much of the research will already be done...if all goes according to plan. I am not kidding, when he is done with school...we will not look back...not even give it a second glance.

Best Friends and Nightmares

I overheard the following conversation the other day between Anna and a little neighbor girl, Rachel. Rachel has moved in within the last few months...so this is the first time Anna has had her over to play. About five minutes after Rachel arrived, I heard this...

Anna: So are we best friends forever and ever and ever and ever until we die?
Rachel: Sure
Anna: Deal?
Rachel: Deal.
Anna: Shake on it?
Rachel: OK

Until they die? Two minutes later, Anna left her new best friend to ask me an important question, "What is her name again?" Best friends that don't know each other's names? It got me thinking, though, about how I long for the days when making friends was that easy.



Another suprise occurred when I was awakened at 3:00 AM a few weeks ago by Anna standing at my bedside. She was complaining of a nightmare. I felt sorry for her, remembering my fear as a child of nightmares. About to invite her into our bed, I asked her what her dream was about. She replied, "Well, I dreamed that I was about to eat some really big, good cotton candy, and then right before I actually ate it, I woke up." Needless to say, I sent her back to bed. Ahhh, that's my girl and my kind of nightmare...like daughter like mother...

We're still here!!!

So perhaps it's time to update my blog and join the land of the living! What a summer we've had...a truly wonderful one, yet largely undocumented due to our broken camera. Finally we have a new camera that is functioning well. Between our new camera and the pictures I've begged off extended family members who have actually been snapping photos, we have this random sampling of our summer. It makes me sad to look at these pictures and realize that summertime is just memories now.











And finally, the crown jewel of the summer, the Grand Canyon. It was an AMAZING, fabulous, death-defying (slight exaggeration) experience. Ben went for the entire 16 days, while I hiked in and met up with them on day 6. It was just a wonderful trip...life-changing for Ben. I sat on his raft through most of the rapids...a raft that most told him was way too small and he was crazy for rowing in the Grand Canyon...but he was flawless on EVERY SINGLE rapid. By the book. I was so proud of him...though still scared spitless. I actually CRIED before one of the biggest rapids out of pure fear. CRIED! I was humiliated as a commercial rafting crew was trying to comfort me before embarking down the rapid themselves. And then, on the very last and biggest rapid of them all, I cried when we finished out of delayed fear. We barely made it out right side up of a monstrous angry hole...but we survived. I'm not kidding when I tell you it took me a lot to face my fears of this water. Here are a couple of pictures from the trip. There are also three youtube videos of some extremely terrifying flips. These videos are NOT of our trip, they are videos of other boats and other trips...and videos of what I was terrified of happening to us. Two of the boats in these videos are 18 foot boats with thousands of pounds of weight strapped in....all to disappear downriver. Watch it if you'd like to see my worst nightmare unfolding. And where are the people who were on these flipped rafts, you might ask? Sucked under and swimming through the rapid. So scary.

Notice their 18 foot raft afterwords...no rowing frame, no gear, one of the tubes lost its air...




This one is a video of a 30' raft with a motor going through a rapid just to give you an idea at how big those waves are...Our was 14'








Presently, we are fully enjoying this time of year and the FABULOUS weather that comes with it. Ben's running the St. George marathon this weekend so we're off to sunny St. George. I've tried training twice for the St. George marathon and my bad knee just can't hack it, so I have to live vicariously through him. Maybe I need to buy a bike or something...

Random Photo

I am posting a random picture of the kids and. Our digital camera broke a few months ago, so we haven't had many pictures. We are buying a camera hopefully soon! This was a random picture taken at Christmastime. Isn't it hilarious that I'm posting this picture instead of one of them fighting? I think it's really funny that everyone's families seem perfect in blogs. If I was to assume that every family was as picture perfect as they appear in their blogs, I'd be awfully worried about my own. Perfect mothers, perfect children, perfect fathers and husbands that never do anything but have fun. But I know blogs are the place for highlights which is what this picture is. I need to blow this picture up to remind myself that they love each other during their arguments during they day. Keep us motivated...

I'm leaving to raft the Grand Canyon tomorrow. Ben's already been gone for 5 days, and I'm hiking in to meet him and his family on Thursday morning. 9 days of camping, dehydrated food, and some of the biggest water in North America. Needless to say, I'm shaking in my boots. I am excited, yet so SCARED!!! I hope I live to tell the tale. I'm also hoping to walk around most of the rapids; I hear it's a definite possibility. Wish me luck!

Cracking me up

I have to say, one of the best things about having young children is the never-ending supply of humor; jokes at their expense, I guess. Lately, for some reason, I've been laughing especially hard. It always gives Ben and me something to snicker at in the evenings. I always think I should be better about writing them down but I never follow through. I heard of a family who wrote the funny things their kids said on slips of paper and then put them in a box to be opened at Christmas. Anyway, some of the funny things they have said or done recently...

The other day, I was weeding in the frontyard (one word?) while Luke was wandering back and forth from the front to the back. He walked up to me with an extremely serious expression while our conversation went as follows:

Me: Hey bud, what's up?

Luke: I was not eating sunscreen.

Me upon quickly realizing that he had indeed eaten sunscreen: Did you find some sunscreen in the backyard?

Luke: Yes.

Me: What did you do with it?

Luke: I did not eat the sunscreen.

Sure you didn't. He definitly needs to work on his manipulation skills. I don't understand how one two year-old child can ingest so many weird things. I have called poison control on him SO MANY times. He even made the front page of their annual community report because of a poison control experience in which he ate mouse poison at one year of age. (Thanks Grandma Cheryl, for rescuing of our little guy) They liked the story so much that they sent a fleet of personnel and photographers to our home a few months later to recount our story for their big old brochure.

On Father's Day, Anna made breakfast in bed for Ben (Captain Crunch and Betty Crocker brownies...I'm either incredibly domestic or he likes weird food...you be the judge). She posted little notes around the house in hidden places about why she loves him, and then watched him open all his little presents. You could see the envy in her eye as she watched him proceed through the fun. After the event, she turned to me and asked quite seriously when it was going to be Daughter's Day. Ah, such a generous child :) I wanted to tell her that every single passing day since her birth 4.5 years ago has been Daughter's Day, that we mothers and fathers have but one day a year, but I refrained.

She also gave her first Primary talk completely on her own. Totally amusing. She was so excited and practiced and practiced with a fake microphone while standing on the fireplace at home. During the talk, she was not the slightest bit nervous and was sure to give cheeser smiles while dramatically gripping the microphone. She loved every second of it. I thought she was stuck about halfway through and leaned down to help her find her place by whispering a cue word. She covered the microphone with her chubby little hand, turned to me and said reassuringly, "I know, Mom." Sorry, darling. She LOVES the microphone...a true blue Belnap. No-one loves to speak to a captivated audience more than a Belnap. I even saw her whisper to her teacher as she sat down that it was SUCH a good talk and she can't WAIT to do it again. At least she's humble. Honestly...

Such good in the world...

This post is to solidify a memory that I can store away and relive on those gloomy days when it seems everyone on earth is unhappy. We had an experience a few weeks ago I won't soon forget. As Ben is in graduate school, we have not had dental insurance for three years and counting. In other words our motto throughout these last years, "brush your teeth and hope for the best." Well, the best was not to be had, and we recently noticed mammoth cavities in our mouths and knew we'd better figure out a way to fork over the dough. Because dental care is somewhat cheaper in his rural Idaho hometown, we made appointments with a dentist there, a dentist Ben had never met.

We were not looking forward to the hundreds of dollars we knew we were going to spend on our cavities and exams, but knew it had to be done. We did indeed have two cavities each, and they were filled with some laughter from us as we tried to talk to each other over the divider with numb cheeks and tongues. When we tried to pay what would have been hundreds of dollars, the doctor informed us that the visit was free! FREE!!!! ABSOLUTELY FREE!!! He said he knew what it was like to attend graduate school with a family, so our exam, x-rays, and fillings were free. This was the first time we had ever met this man and he still extended such generosity. Either that or he just felt really really sorry for us. I can't tell you what this meant to us. Thank you, thank you, Dr. Hammond.

School Days

Today was Anna's last day of preschool. She was peeved that school is over and just can't fathom why anyone would just close school down for the summer. Isn't it wonderful when school is actually still fun for kids? For those of you who remember the trauma when she entered school, you understand what a big statement that is and just how far she's come. Ben and I were laughing last night about how humorous/tragic that first month was, so I decided to post some of the stuff that came out of her mouth at that time (and you just never know what will come out of that child's mouth).

The first few days were dynamite. I had been expecting a scene, as she never does well with change, but she charged into that classroom without looking back. That was week one, the calm before the storm. Week two... she decides she doesn't like the boys. "They're nice, I just don't like them. I just don't like boys I don't know." OK...I know that in about 10 years I will be WISHING for her to make that statement, but for a preschooler? Come on... She also told me the only thing she liked about school was the goodbye song because that meant I was coming to get her and school was over. Great, I pay a monthly tuition for a goodbye song. I tried every reasoning tactic I could muster to remind her how great school was, nothing worked. Finally, I suggested a prayer, figuring that there was no time like the present for a spiritual experience. I could just imagine her childlike faith, how great this would be for her, and that she would always remember this experience. The conversation that followed went something like this…

Me: Why don’t we say a prayer, Anna, and ask God to help you at school so that you won’t be so nervous.

Anna: That won’t work.

Me: Well, God will always help you, but you have to believe that He will. If you really believe that He will, He WILL help you.

Anna: I believe He can help me, I just don’t think it’s going to work.

Me: Well, why don’t we give it a try?

She said her little prayer and I waited for her to tell me what a remarkable experience it was and that she was ready to go to school with a smile. Instead, all I heard was her quiet muttering, “Well, THAT didn’t work. Still nervous.” Nice. So much for her spiritual experience.

Over time, her anxiety diminished, and it is now her favorite place to be. I laugh that maybe her prayer was answered. We'll see how next fall goes in her new preschool class, but until then, I guess I'll be coming up with interesting ways to keep her entertained for the summer. Wish me luck.

If I Had Known

I've been meaning to post about this for a long time now. My great sister-in-law, Hannah Belnap Porter, wrote this wonderful poem that I have to share. Now STOP! Don't exit my blog just yet. I know what you're thinking... "A poem? I don't read blogs to discover new poetry"... but trust me, just trust me, you won't be disappointed. Ben read it first and told me to check it out, that he was quite emotional reading it. The next day, I did, and emotional myself, read it again and again. So just trust me...read on...

Hannah put this together at Easter about her experiences as a Physician's Assistant (PA) student at the Cook County Jail in Chicago, supposedly a horrible, mean place to be imprisoned. She has spent the last two years getting her Graduate Degree there in Chicago, and at this particular rotation at the jail, found herself grappling with feelings and questions that I think we can all relate to at one point or another in our lives. A little explanation of the poem and how it came to be in an email she sent with the poem...

"I have had many, many difficult moments of grappling with why this world is so unfair, comparing my life to theirs. They just didn't seem to have a chance from day one. Born as crack babies. A childhood of abuse. Eye witnesses of shootings, murders, and overdoses. Inevitably, drugs become their escape from a living hell. And drugs land them right inside the Cook County Jail. They broke a law, and the punishment is fair and has to be. But these are real people, who, guilty or not, are still victims of an unfair playing field. And I'm not so sure I would have done much better in their shoes. Maybe. Hopefully. But I just don't know.

Remember King Benjamin's answer to people who think we should withhold our charity because "the man hath brought upon himself his misery" and his "punishments are just." "For behold," he says, "are we not all beggars?"

These are things I have grappled with, cried over, and prayed about. One day it all came together in a rush of emotion that became a poem. I want to share it with you all, because never before has the Easter message been so clear or so beautiful to me.'

If I Had Known

We were born on different planets, you and I.
Or, at least, on different footing.

But if I had known…
You had a gun when you were 9
I would have invited you to play.
I had a brand new jump rope.
But you were trying to kill yourself
With the gun you had when you were 9.

If I had known…
Your daddy was selling you when you were 4
I would have invited you to my house.
My dad would’ve told us bedtime stories about magical flying horses.
But you were trying to not feel the pain
While grown men passed you around when you were 4.

If I had known…
Your mom abandoned you when you were 7
You could have lived with me.
My mom would have taught you to frost sugar cookies too.
But you were all alone in the ‘projects’
A little boy abandoned at age 7.

If I had known…
Your dad was giving you cocaine when you were 6
You could have come over for dinner.
I would have shared my favorite—Mom’s lasagna.
But you were hungry, with a strange burn in your nose
Snorting cocaine when you were 6.

If I had known…
Your dad told you you’d “never be nothin’ but a whore” when you were 10
My dad could have told you the truth.
Just like he told me I could be anything I wanted to be.
But you believed your dad
With no one else to believe when you were 10.

If I had known…
Your grandpa was abusing you when you were 12
You could have visited my grandpa instead.
He let us swing around on the clothesline in the backyard.
But while I swung around you were having a baby
Pregnant by your grandpa at age 12.

If I had known…
You would be driven to sell yourself when you were 16
I would have taught you, my sister, about our Father.
And how the worth of all souls is great in His sight.
But you never heard that there was another option
Besides selling yourself over and over when you were 16.

If I had known…
Your husband would kick you in your pregnant stomach.
I could have taught you how to choose a husband.
Mine left me a message that same day, just to say he loved me.
But no one ever told you that you deserved more
Than a man who only knows how to kick.

If I had known…
You would get high and shake your baby when you were exactly my age
I would have come for your baby.
I would have sung him to sleep instead.
But your little baby is with God now
And you’re in jail, at exactly my age.

Dear God, with your unlimited power why do you let it all happen?

“What would you do, my child, if you had my unlimited power with your limited vision?
“Would you have saved them all from their suffering?”

Yes! If I had known…

“And with that power what would you have done at Carthage?
“What would you have done at Golgotha?
“Would you have stopped the suffering before it was done?
My child, aren’t you glad you don’t make those decisions.”

It is not for me to know…
Why I got all the blessings until there seemed to be none left for you.
I only know that where much is given much is expected.
There are those who are to serve and those who are to be served upon.
So because I have been given much, I too must give.
To you, the “least of these.”

For how long, and how much?
Until I have made up the difference
Between a gun and a jump rope.
Between sugar cookies and cocaine.
Between peace and fear.

Until I hear Him say,
“These deeds shall thy memorial be; Fear not, thou didst them unto me.”

Oh it is wonderful!
That He who judges when it counts knows the whole story.
That this life is only a glimpse of the soul’s life.
That “the Son of Man hath descended below them all.”
The purest of all pure stained with the foulest of all filth.
“Nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.”

And now you, little girl turned prostitute, still have a chance.
To rise from the filth and become even as the Purest of all pure.
And so does your grandpa.
And so do I.
Oh it is wonderful!

I stand all amazed.

-Hannah Porter

"For you, a thousand times over..."

Wow, I think we may be the worst bloggers out there. We've been meaning to update this thing for quite some time now, but we just haven't gotten around to it.

Anyway, we had a great time the other day flying a kite. We decided to go for the big rainbow kite for $9.99 rather than the small batman kite for $5.99. All-in-all, I think we made a good choice. The big rainbow kite was a good flier--definitely four dollars better.

So as it turns out, the kids had a really good time. Truth be told, we did too. I (Ben) don't think I had ever successfully flown a kite before. I must say, there is something very gratifying about watching your kite fly high above everyone else's...even if it's a giant rainbow butterfly kite and the competition is a bunch of little kids.

After repeating the same lines from The Kite Runner over (see title of post) and over (getting less and less funny with each repeat) we successfully battled the win and rocked our little butterfly at 400 feet. It was magnificent.

Below, you'll see Anna whose spirit would simply not be broken in her attempts to fly a kite. She ran and ran, bless her heart, trying to get that kite going--to no avail. So she was able to do the majority of the kite flying once we got the kite in the air.




Here's Luke giving it his best shot:



Now we have a cute video of Luke who was getting a little frustrated but ended up being at the right place at the right time when his kite caught wind--or the wind caught the kite. Watch the video to see his surprised reaction. One or the other. Either way, we all had a very nice time.

Our baby growing up...

I can't believe how fast it's come, but Luke turned two years old last Wednesday. Our baby really isn't a baby anymore. What a special little child he is. He has changed our lives in so many ways with his sweetness, his calm, and his humor. He truly is one of a kind. Happy Birthday Luke; we love you so much.

We celebrated his birthday with a trip to Chuck E. Cheese. We had a great time. Pizza, tokens, all the arcade games a kid can handle, cake, Grandma, cousins, and aunts. The highlight of the evening for me was when Ben took Luke up the playtoy. They have a big tubelike contraption similar to McDonalds playlands...the kind that stink like pee and resemble a winding maze. In the midst of the tubes, there was a big car that the kids could sit in and drive. Luke was desperate to get there but couldn't figure out how, so Ben finally begrudgingly agreed to take him through. Not only was it positively disgusting and practically impossible to get there as a grown man, but he reported afterwards that all the kids were screaming at him, "Hey! No grown-ups allowed!" Boy did I laugh.

Some pictures from the party...



Luke and his favorite new Chuck E. Cheese friend


Cousin Eliza with my sister, Katie, her husband, Jeremiah, and baby Wilson in utero


Anna and her cousin, Rue, pigging out on pizza


Darling baby Max with Rachel, Ben's sister









And finally, click on this video for Luke's candle-blowing endeavor. You can see that this was serious business for him...he wasn't messing around. But you must ignore the extra-loud rendition of his mother singing "Happy Birthday" at a much higher volume than anyone else in the room. I guess I was really feeling it...embarrassing. The video also captured my sister, Katie's, pregnancy laugh. She had her baby 3 days later and her laugh has sadly returned to normal. Nothing gets me laughing harder than laughing right alonside the pregnancy laugh.

Kids Are Reinforcing For Parents

Hi, this is Ben. How's it going? So I have this social psychology class that is pretty interesting, I suppose. There are about 8 people in the class, and 4 of us are of your classic Utah demographic--white, male, returned missionary, fathers of one, two, or three in mid- to late-twenties.

So somehow, we got on the topic of what it's like to have kids. So the half of us with kids began talking about how life-changing it is, and how difficult it can be. The other students kind of laughed and said, "Yeah, we always get the response, but it is followed by the obligatory 'But there's nothing better!'" So they started prying a little deeper. One friend of mine in there asked if we would have waited a few more years to have kids, knowing what we know now. I said that I wouldn't have, but I did say that I would like to go back to the time of not having kids knowing what I know now about how life would after kids. I would appreciate little things like sleeping in and not always having to have one person home at night while the kids sleep. What the other students must have heard was, "I hate my kids," so they let me have it. I said, "Wait. I'll put it like this..." I went on to say that it's very hard, but there truly is nothing better. I got a little emotional explaining what a great feeling it is to come home from school or work and have my little kids run out on the doorstep yelling to me to hurry up. And it is a great feeling.

So the guy next to me spoke next. He's a friend of mine in my cohort with a daughter about 18 months old. He put it very well, I think. He said, "I'm a behaviorist, so I look at it solely on the level of behavior. Having kids is reinforcing. When my daughter gets hurt, she comes running to me yelling 'Daddy! Daddy!' It makes me feel important and needed." He cited a few other examples and closed just by saying something like, "Maybe I'm selfish, but I love having a child because she is so reinforcing to me." Everyone laughed, and I really thought it was funny--with a little underlying truth to it.

I didn't give his "reinforcing" comment much thought after class ended until I sat down with my kids for dinner the next night. They were in really goofy moods, I guess, because they were just cracking up at everything I said. I started to think, "Yeah, this whole parent thing is a little reinforcing." So Jamie got some video and I've got a little clip below. We got on the subject of "Little Einsteins" and somehow started making up nonsense words to go after "Little". Really thinking about it, I must say that it is probably in the bottom 5 percent of funniest things I've ever done. As far as unfunny goes, this was right down there with Cuba Gooding Jr.'s last Disney effort "Snow Dogs". Pretty unfunny. But to a 4- and 2-year-old, you'd think they just got a personal stand-up show from Jerry Seinfeld himself. So now, I must agree that kids are very reinforcing. At least someone thinks I'm funny.

Earth Glue: Lawn mowing albums and songs that speak to your soul

A little more autobiography. Forgive me.

Part One:

When I was a young lad, it was my responsibility to mow our immense lawn in Montpelier, Idaho. When I tell you that it was an entire acre, I am not kidding. It took hours. Well, as a 15-year-old, I got a Discman for Christmas. You remember Discmans? They were awesome. Mine took 8 AA batteries, and they lasted about 6 hours. Anyway, I was very excited about this Discman. The first idea that came to mind on how I would use it was for mowing the lawn. However, it was too large to carry with me while I mowed, so I spent the rest of the winter coming up with a plan on how to use it while mowing the lawn. I've never claimed to have any ingenuity, and consequently, when the summer arrived, the only idea I had come up with was to duct tape the cd player around my chest under my shirt. If it were over my shirt it would have skipped too much. It needed to be as secure as possible. My next task was finding an album that was so good that I would not have to skip any songs...a lawn mowing album. Tom Petty Greatest Hits was the closest I could find at the time, but "Don't Come Around Here No More" messed it up. At that particular time in my life, I was unaware of the amazing music that came out in the early nineties, available at my fingertips, so finding a 'lawn-mowing' album was difficult.

Part Two:

I will be forever indebted to Jordan Pope. He was a great friend, and I have unfortunately fallen out of touch with him, though we both live in the SLC area. When I was 15, I went on a school trip with Jordan and some other friends to London. After listening to Green Day Dookie seven times in a row on the airplane, I was tired of it (and have been ever since, to be honest). Jordan handed me an album from a music group of whom I not heard as we landed. "Try this cd," he said, "I think you'll like it." I grabbed it, thanked him, and put it in my Discman. I did not have time to listen to it as I got my luggage at the airport, but as soon as we got on the bus from the airport, I played it. The first song, I thought was a little weird, so I skipped to the second. What transpired at that moment was a life-changing experience. This song spoke to my soul. I know that sounds dramatic...it is. But it is the only way I can describe it. A friend of mine comes the closest to matching the description by saying "mind-blowing (Springer, 2006)".

I sat back in my seat on the bus and listened as this song from Jordan Pope spoke to my soul while we made our way into London. I remember everything like it was yesterday...the weather, the sites, but mostly the sensation deep inside of me that overwhelmed me as this song spoke to my soul. I remember hoping the song would never end. And when it did, I closed my eyes, took a few deep breaths, and continued on with the rest of the "mind-blowing (Springer, 2006)" album.

That album was the first true lawn-mowing album I experienced, and that song was the first song that ever truly spoke to my soul. So without further adieu, I offer you the title track off of Radiohead's second album, The Bends. Thank you, Jordan Pope.

May this song speak to your soul as it did mine, and may you find this album and duct tape it to your chest in a Discman. You will be happy for the 6 hours your batteries will last you, but miserable for the 2+ hours it will take you to get the duct tape off.





Reference:

Springer, B.J. (2006). What makes a song "mind-blowing". Discussions en route to Daybreak Elementary, (2)1.

Can parallel parking skills attract women?

A good question. I have been married for five years now and am quite "out of the game", as they call it. Of course by saying I am only "out of the game", I am implying that there was a time in my life when was in said "game." That is somewhat misleading. As can be clearly seen above (a picture taken at my job about 20 seconds ago), I am not a "lady killa," "playa," "balla," nor any other noun with a single 'a' in place of the 'er'.

However, there is one thing going for me in the positive direction. What I lack in good looks and impressive physique, I make up in parallel parking skills. It drives Jamie, my dear wife, crazy that I always brag about it. In fact, she hopes and prays that there are no parallel spots available when we are looking for a spot because she has to listen to me brag about it. Well, there's one thing she doesn't have to do when we find a spot...that is wait for me to take several stabs at parking then give up. If the spot can possibly fit my car with 6 inches on either side, you'll be walking to your final destination within seconds. Well the other day I was at the Gateway in Salt Lake City (I thought I'd specify for all you out-of-state readers I have out there...I sometimes read this blog when I'm outside of the beehive state.). Anyway, the Gateway was quite crowded so I had to resort to the parallel spots on the street to the west of the mall (500 W.). I found a tight spot and was parked within seconds, naturally, but on my way to the mall, something caught my eye. A person in a gray sedan was struggling mightily trying to squeeze into a spot. I slowed down and watched traffic build behind the driver, but the driver was persistent on getting in. So I thought I would do society a favor.

I walked over to the car and tapped on the window. The window rolled down to reveal a young lady probably in her early twenties. She looked a little weirded out (see picture above), but before she could get too nervous, I said, "Can I help you park your car?" Turns out, she got a little more nervous...understandably. I said, "Really, I'm an excellent parallel parker." She turned to her friend, another young lady in her early twenties, gave her a shrug, looked at the line up of cars behind her, and said, "Sure." She and her friend got out of the car, and I worked my magic. Though it was a clutch I wasn't used to, I was able to get into the space in one try, obviously, and shut the car off, got out, and gave her the keys. She said, "Thanks a lot," to which I replied, "no problem."

I walked off and got about ten feet away when I heard the driver over my shoulder, "So I guess you want my number, right?" I turned around and casually replied, "No thanks, I'm married. Just wanted to use what skills I have to make the world a better place. Take care." And I was off like a phantom in the night.

So the moral of the story is, if a guy like me, who has been so out of touch for so long and was never really in touch in the first place, can get someone to offer their number for successfully parallel parking their car, there is hope for all of you who want an easy way to get digits. By the way, do they still call them "digits"? Better question: did they ever call them "digits"? Good luck out there, fellas. There are many fine-lookin' ladies just waiting to have their cars parallel parked.